Book Week mania is over, and I've now had a chance to recharge my batteries, hang out with the family, smell the gorgeous salty sea breezes from my front verandah - heck, I've even cleaned the house. Technically, I should be brimming with enthusiasm, ready to smash away at the keyboard every chance I get, building my WIP towards its thrilling climax.
But I haven't written a word. Not one.
I open up my file and read snippets, hoping that will get me motivated. Some bits I read, I know are fit only for the waste disposal, but that's okay - it's only a first draft, I can cope with that. Other bits excite me. I really like my characters. I miss them, even. And I am clear about what is going to happen in the next half dozen scenes. I have visualised the scenes over and over, can hear my characters talking - calling to me. So what's my problem?
Writer's block? Nah - I know what I want to write; I just can't get my fingers to do the walking.
Lack of time? Possibly - I've started a new role at Walker Books, and am now full time, all the time, so this is probably part of the reason. (And the reason I like to hide behind.)
But if I am completely frank and honest with myself, I know the real reason. And it's not pretty.
Truth is, I'm scared.
Hang in there Sue, staring at a puter is sometimes counter-productive to inspiration... I'm sure once you get in the groove there will be no stopping you! xx
ReplyDeleteI know how you feel Sue.
ReplyDeleteThe thought of the Government removing our territorial protection terrifies me. It is hard enough now to break into the publishing industry without worrying about how much harder it will become for an Australian writer afterwards. As things stand, I figure I have a three-year window of opportunity to break in. Tick tick tick.
It's almost paralysing.
Probably different reasons but I know the fear.
Jeff
Poor Sue. A feeling I can sooo relate to. Just remember you are a fabulous writer, and fear is your enemy. You can beat him (to a pulp!)
ReplyDelete